bpb puts together a World Cup match-the-columns, pairing your poison with the best bar deal on that drink. Also find attached, some rubbish drunken chatter.

For the Beer Guzzler: Get the very, very tall beer tower at Sports Bar Express for Rs 936 (serves 8) and Bonobo does a World Cup bucket of 4 pints for Rs 550 (valid every day until the World Cup ends). And while you’re at it, check this cool apparatus that lets you down a pint in 3 seconds or less. Sports Bar Express, ground floor, Regal Cinema Building, Shahid Bhagat Singh Road, Colaba, call 66396681; Bonobo, Kenilworth, 2nd floor, off Linking Road, next to KFC, Bandra (W), call 26055050.

From one drunk to another: A labeorphilist isn’t some kind of perv. It’s a person who collects beer bottles.

For the Whisky Drinker: Get five large Vat 69s for Rs 499. Also see buy-one-get-one-free deal on large pegs of imported spirits. Valid all through February and March from noon to 1 am. At Manchester United Cafe Bar, level 3, The Palladium, High Street Phoenix, Lower Parel, call 43601111; level 4, Nirmal Lifestyle Mall, LBS Marg, Mulund (W), call 65888077.

From one drunk to another: You may get frisky after so much whisky.

For Sharp Shooters and Cocktail Mixers: All through the World Cup months, get a round of five tequila shots for Rs 750 at TGIF. Buy one cocktail, get one free at Ruby Tuesday from 4 pm to 8 pm. TGIF, Infiniti Mall, Andheri (W) and Palladium Mall, Lower Parel, call 66155687; Ruby Tuesday, unit no 31, C R-II Mall, ground floor, Nariman Point, call 66510709.

From one drunk to another: Did you know that Bonobo at Bandra has a shot on the menu called ‘Balaadkaar’? Also, see recipe for the yum Alaska shot, served at Olive Bar and Kitchen.

For the Vodka Drinker: Get unlimited vodka (domestic – gag!) and four starters for Rs 999 during the screening of all World Cup matches. At Hard Rock Cafe, Bombay Dyeing Mills Compound, Pandurang Budhkar Marg, Worli, call 24382888.

From one drunk to another: Drink cheap vodka and take this pop quiz on Russian writers.

For the Rum Drinker: Buy one get one free on Indian made foreign rum from Sunday to Thursday, noon to 10 pm and Friday to Saturday, noon to 8 pm. Valid until April 2. At HQ’s, opposite Regal Cinema, Colaba, call 22883985 / 65140197.

From one drunk to another: Gum ka saathi rum.